People Watching

It's a cold and rainy saturday morning as I sit in the car dealership waiting for my oil change to get done. I am listening to a mix of Billie Holiday, Miles Davis, Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra-well, you get the point. Anyway, I sit here listening to my mix, looking around the room I realize something...I am a self-proclaimed professional people watcher. And to one up that, I have a perfect soundtrack for today's people watching.

How often do you sit there and really look at someone and do one of two things? 1. Wonder what is really happening in their life or what they are thinking about at that exact moment. 2. Make up your own story for them, because they are a perfect canvas for an exciting or scandalous adventure. I mean, how is it possible to not think through at least one of these scenarios?? I'm going to go out on a limb and say most people go with option one based on what someone is wearing and maybe one or two facial expressions. Me, I often go with option two. It is WAY more fun. For example, there is a middle aged man sitting next to me setting up his new cell phone with the phone company. He is getting all of the information on his new and improved plan. Now, Option One people would probably say that he was due for his free upgrade and decided to add a few bells and whistles to seem cooler to his kids. Mmmk, I can see that, but it's somewhat boring. Me and my other Option Two people might say that he got a second phone for another, more exciting reason. He is really a spy for the Canadian government (fitting Robert DiNiro's sly CIA agent style in "Meet the Parents") and his wife is close to finding out. He had to get a second phone so their plans are separate and she doesn't accidentally stumble in the middle of huge espionage case he has been working on for the past 15 years. Despite his efforts, she gets involved anyway and she is kidnapped by the Canadian Mounties (police) and interrogated in some wood cabin up in the Yukon Territory. She obviously doesn't know anything, so instead of "taking care of her" they leave her in the middle of nowhere and she is forced to learn all the necessary survival skills to live another 10 years in the deep Canadian Forests. At that point, her long lost high school sweetheart (not the spy guy...it was always a secret she kept buried while married to the spy guy) comes hiking through the deep Canadian Forests and they find each other. They immediately fall back into love and create a Swiss Family Robinson style home and live happily ever after. By the way, due to today's soundtrack this all happens in the 1920's.

Ok, so maybe that is a little far fetched, but still, its more exciting than just listening to the guy pick out his favorite ringtone. Speaking of which, why is it that most middle aged people (no offense to my middle aged readers, if there are any) pick the most obnoxious and annoying ringtones? Then they put it on full blast and when they finally fish it out of their purse or unhook it from their handy dandy belt clip, they look at the number, allowing it to continue to ring and THEN pick it up. Do us all a favor and put it on silent while you are figuring out if you want to talk to the person!! I would rather listen to Beyonce's "All the single Ladies" ringtone than the annoying one you pick out. On the other side of the spectrum, do kids nowadays really not understand that having an offensive rap ringtone may not be the smartest idea?? Being in the middle of history class and having Dr. Dre's "F**k You" go off is sure to land you in detention. Common sense people!!!

That being said, I'm going to continue listening to my big band music and wait for my Bob Marley "One Love" ringtone to go off. Happy Saturday everyone!